Fair Elections

When I went to vote the other evening, in the cafeteria of the nearby middle school, I found the table where my immediate neighbors and I get our ballots.   They opened a spiral bound book to a page where my name and my signature appeared over a blank box.   They turned the book around, handed me a pen and I signed in the blank box.   The two signatures did not look identical, I noted to myself.   As they handed me my ballot I commented that it was nice I didn’t need five kinds of specific government issued ID in order to vote.   The poll workers at the table smiled.

“How do you know I’m not one of those three million dead Mexicans who voted against the president last time?”  I asked, with a zombie-like smile.    They emitted a small laugh that made me later add to my telling of the story “I thought you poll watchers were supposed to be nonpartisan.”   I took the large, two page ballot, with the ambiguous and problematic ballot initiatives I’d decided to vote against (2 out of 3 passed) and voted for a bunch of people I don’t particularly like, none of the candidates I’d supported in the primaries had made it to the final ballot.   That’s America.   If you still don’t think it’s important to vote for lesser evils, look no further than lying, irrational, authoritarian, two year-old President Pantload and tell me so.   We have a shit system, make the best of it, folks.

At 4:44 a.m., as even I was making little sleeping sounds on my pillow, our president tweeted this:

Screen shot 2018-11-13 at 1.19.52 PM.png

Same shit, different day.   After he lost the popular vote in November 2016 by about three million votes he came up with the story that three million dead Mexicans had come out of their graves to vote for his lying, crooked, felonious opponent.  He’d been fraudulently robbed of a huge landslide victory that was rightfully his.  He formed a committee to uncover this massive illegal zombie voter fraud[1].   It was headed by his religious fanatic V.P., a Koch-funded zealot, and Kansas secretary of state Kris Kobach, also funded by Koch (in their home state).   Kobach styled himself an expert in voter suppression though he lost his bid to become governor of the largely Republican state.   Kobach’s loss was, due, likely (or unlikely, if you prefer), to massive fraud by the very people whose votes he was trying to suppress.  Here the brilliant Jane Mayer analyzes the Trumpist’s loss.

Study after study shows that in person voter fraud is virtually non-existent.  The real fraud in American elections is in how the candidates are selected (based largely on their ability to raise huge sums of money, particularly oceans of that limitless dark money) and how easily electronic voting machines can be manipulated to get the desired results.   Oh, yes, and how many votes are suppressed by a variety of measures including laws that target certain problematic demographics, the young, minorities, etc.

Now that Barack Obama is safely in prison after illegally wiretapping Trump during the last presidential campaign and the millions of dead Mexican rapist voters are back in their graves, stakes through their hearts, and the most extreme partisan available was forced through to cement the rightist majority on the  Supreme Court, and the Saudis have exonerated themselves for the premeditated murder of a prominent critic, and in spite of continued mass shootings there are no more hysterical cries for sensible gun control (that would cost, conservatively, 10,000,000, or possibly even a billion, American jobs, along with our freedom)  everything should go back to normal now.    The president’s party, in spite of losing 32 seats (with ten still too close to call) in the House, and six governors (with two too close to call), had a big win in the midterms, getting all nine of their senate seats that were up for grabs, or most of them, or whatever.   Huge night for the president and his agenda, whatever that may be.

God bless these United Shayssssh and, for god’s sake, go back to sleep Mr. President!

 

[1] Jane Mayer:

The commission disbanded in disrepute after becoming stymied by in-fighting and the failure to find any significant fraud, but it nonetheless helped to make Kobach a rising conservative star.   source

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