There is no greater love, believes the group, than undeviating antipathy toward a hated betrayer of the group. This principle seems to operate everywhere, throughout history. If you can show someone is disloyal, a traitor, has betrayed a loving group, well, whatever is coming to such a person is well deserved, in the eyes of the loyal, loving group.

We see it daily with MAGA. We see it with groups like the Klan, Nazis, all those fine people, in every insular group. We see it on the left and on the right, though it is most conspicuous lately on the right. There is nothing a beloved member of the far right can do that will cause other members to condemn the behavior. Loyalty über alles. On the other hand, criticize the beloved member and you will be promptly vilified and tossed out of the group. MAGA has a great term for traitors like Bill Barr, lately come to a realistic assessment of his former master: RINO. Republican in name only, like Liz Cheney and her filthy ilk.

Having experienced this ostracism recently in my personal life – a minor conflict with two people who can never be wrong, a series of threats and long periods of silence, lies about my behavior, unanimous judgment by old friends insisting they love me but won’t talk about what they already know I did and am now lying about — I understand that the evil involved in this human reflex is almost incidental. Going along with the group is as natural as taking the underdog’s side in a fight.

At the same time, the person who tells the initial lies, no matter how desperate they feel when they assassinate the good name of an old friend, has no right to do that. The group, if they take her side, is acknowledging that truth and falsehood are trifles when it comes to the seriously hurt feelings of an overwhelmed, beloved member of the group. You could also call those reputation killing lies evil, I would, but, fuck, I’m judgmental enough without bringing good and evil into it. Ask any of my former close friends.