On the ahimsa front, it often seems like thankless work, except in looking back on how much worse it might have been without the attempt to stay mild.  

It is always better not to put the other person on the defensive.  Defensiveness makes a person prone to lash out, rattler-like, and catch you with a fang.  This, in turn, leads to the reflex to crush the serpent’s head, to their countermove, to your ass getting bitten again.  

So even if you kill the provoker, you need to get to the emergency room pronto, Tonto.  There is no winner in such a game, though it is played out countless times every minute around the world.

I am glad every time I’m able to avoid a confrontation with some asshole who desperately needs to have their ass kicked and their face shoved into it.  But it’s hard work, Brownie, for sure, and seems thankless much of the time.  It’s like water dripping and making an impression in stone, the progress imperceptible, except looking back over a long period of time.

That said, it may be the most valuable work we can do, for ourselves and for the world.