A woman I know, now a very successful businesswoman with her own business, took me to lunch on April 10.  She made me two promises, kept neither.  On the third anniversary of my mother slipping into a coma,  (her mother died three days later and we were momentarily united in grief), I emailed her asking her about those two promises.  The book she refers to is one I loaned her called “Death Benefits” that I found very useful in processing the loss of my mother.  She was too busy to open it and promised to have her assistant send it back to me pronto.

It was a fourth email, mixed in with a call her assistant fielded.  I was direct.  So was she.  Here’s her reply, a classic of its kind, which arrived 21 minutes after I sent mine:

I am busy–I am running a very demanding business, travelling, and in addition have been engrossed in two opportunities to sell and merge my business over the past two months.  I also raised $100,000 for the nonprofit that honored me, so it has been an exceptionally busy time.  I can only deal with non-work stuff on weekends and last weekend was the first weekend we had electricity (and internet service) on Fire Island, where we have been every weekend since I saw you.  I am not sure yet what I am doing about M____.  I know her through A____ and he thought my idea that she could help you was totally off base.  When I have time and am seeing her in person, I will raise it with her.  However, if there is any risk whatsoever that you would send her an email like this one, I will not pursue it–so please promise me that.

I am so sorry I completely forgot about your book.  I forgot to send myself a reminder, which I have done now.  I do feel terrible that you won’t have it tomorrow on your mom’s anniversary and will take care of it ASAP.   My mom died on May 24th.

A____ is right.  The idea that she could help me in any way is totally off base.  On to more productive thoughts.